You are the girl who built herself walls so high. Some would try to let it come down but, no. Some would tell you have standards higher than Everest, some would convince you should lower it like you don’t deserve what you want. Truth is, all you want is an emotional connection with a quirky soul who would share your great enthusiasm of serving God. You are not even waiting for someone to break your walls, eeew that is lame. You are waiting for yourself to jump over and take that leap of faith.
You are tired of endless dating nonsense. And so is he. He would come to you hopeful romantic and you can also see how vulnerable he is. He tells you he admires you not because you are pretty but how you made yourself at your young age, your values, your faith, and how you earnestly serve your God. The exact ways you want to be adored. Your friends will interrogate him well if he is worthy of you. Not because you are a Grade A girl but because your friends know how easy it is to break your heart.
But because he is not the right one for you, some things must be said to end your connection. He says he is not good for you. Does not deserve you. Not the man you were praying for. Would fix himself—Same things you hear since you were 16. Same things you hear when you had your first heartbreak. And you almost forgot, same things on why you even built your walls so high. Such lies.
Of course you don’t believe ‘em, hello?? They are under the false illusion that it is the easiest way to end it. That you can’t handle the hard truth. Why would even a person leave for the exact same reasons they have liked you in the first place? So you are left figuring out the real reason. Who knows, one of these days you’ll find out through his friends, photos that he is tagged, you become the greatest social media detective, you’ll find out however. Was it because you were too naive for an adult relationship? Was it because you were never the girl they thought you were? Or some girls are making them feel better than you do. Assume all you want. Maybe one of them is true. But that’s ok. You could never be enough for the wrong person. Don’t wish that you have done better because everything was (not) meant to be. Get out of that mental trap of finding the right answers. Honey, you may be crying a river now but please know that you would still end up with the right one bec God is in control. You know yourself that you always pray so there is no wrong decisions or choices because the right one would always find its way to you. Hang on, its not easy but you will outgrow this.
Again, just one wrong guy down. And believe it honey, it’s not you it’s them.??
Disclaimer: Opinions and views may change or may not matter anymore as I grow old.